My VSCB Life

Handover 2006

2006-04-09T08:16:00.000-07:00

Its so fast, handover is over already. Still can remember the day i got my post. its freaking fast, now its me who's presenting the post. haiz kinda sad to leave this band, but old guys gotta leave and new ones gotta replace. I'm still wondering whether my batch has made the right choice in choosing the leaders, but oh well we dun really have alarge pool of people to select from. hopefully all of them do well lar.

the day before handover, was chionging the SL guide, WTH. so many people havent handed in thier work.. grr, had to receive last minute stuff.. inside was fuming, outside was tired, overall felt sucky.. while waiting for ben ben to finish, i went to watch "GOAL" the movie.. dvd... haha... watch till 2 plus.. ben came online gave me, edited then went to sleep. I finally finished this project of mine that i have planned all the way back since the march band camp. can still remember the day night the organizers stayed back... i guess that was the day i chionged out a basic plan of the whole project.. i wont say its very tedious to do the whole thing, but it takes hell lot of time... I guess all the late nights really paid off, when i finally completed it. was so relieved i managed to do it finished in time... Firstly i would really like to thank the SLs for surpporting this project. to me its a very important thing because i feel that its the only way that we (now alumni) can show our support for the new leaders and guide them along... i would really like to thank eng loong benjamin shikang muwahiddiin wai hong pang kah siong for showing the effort and concern for their new leaders... oh well enough of this haha..

the last few days was really hard, alot of decisions to make. alot of reluctance to leave... leaving band really leaves me very empty. suprisingly no one cried in the handover, maybe its because we have done our part crying over the past one year haha... but oh well people felt sad. especially sad when i parted with my instrument.. haha.. but the new guy using better use it well, he better not unseason it for me sia.. haha... anyway would like to wish all the best to the new leaders.... the post u get doesnt matter, big or small doesnt matter, what matters is that u all are working for the band. and make sure that u all do ur work in band well... with great responsibility comes great power. with small responsibility comes great amount work. all of u have your own difficulty in your posts so dun feel bad if u get a so called " unsignificant post" in the band.. because everyone one in the band is important. As long as u do your job to your fullest ability, u need not feel bad even if everything fails. its the effort that counts not the result. ALL THE BEST. The End of My Very Special Concert Band Life. hopefully not. Shall update when its back.

A Bitter path to a Better future

2006-03-11T22:36:00.001-08:00

Well well, so far the most problematic batch i've ever encountered... shouldnt comment further... haiz anyway we had band practice on saturday, well, there was lesser people only the sec4s and sec2s... the sound was much cleaner than other band pracs, and well i would say it was ok... but if only the sec4s and 3s play would sound much better... that means the sec2s really have to buck up... anyway i feel that some sections are not doing their part in their band... i just have to name some... trumpet and few more... i seriously dunno what the trumpet section is doing... they waste our time in band prac, they dont do sectionals, they dun come down to practice often, they dun do anything but fool around... the sec4s dont care, the sec2s cannot care, the sec3 (no s) is pretty much too busy to handle anything but himself.... yar.. so i feel that they are not doing anything when everyone else is doing so much... actually, it works downwards if u realise...

imagine a triangle, cut up into 3 horizontal slots... the biggest, the base is the slot for individual hours practice time... its a basic requirement for everyone to improve.. one can only improve by doing individuals... personally i feel that one must settle the basic requirement before moving up. i meanits pretty pointless to go for sectionals when one havent settled his own parts of the music...
the middle slot is smaller than the bigger base... and i would put sectionals in there... i feel the main point of having sectionals is to correct minor and commonly overlooked mistakes as a section, and not getting stuck on one particular part with the section not even able to play a simple passage... sectionals is also a time where we can work on balance and iontonation as a section... only when we have achieved something at asection level, then can we go on to settle music on a band lvl...
the last small slot. i feel is the "bonus" part of the whole triangle.. it makes the triangle complete... and i feel everyone should not miss out on the other the foundations of the triangles and we should have this triangle concept in our minds... settle things one by one from the very bottom... after we have done our individuals... we are ready to work on our music as a section where everyone plays the same instruments and work to gether to make the section sound good... then when every section have done their sectionals and settled their sound and techniques we come together and work on balanceing between sections, and much more stuff... then we can focus more on music expression and bringing more out of the music we make... instead of using band practices as a time to correct our techniques.. i feel these things should be done on an individual level.. and any doubts should be settled at a section level.. the band prac time should be used for music making... but without the the 2 foundations of the triangle one can never reach the top of the triangle... and to have a complete triangle it doesnt take only one guy to do it... it requires the effort of everyone... well enough said.. i have couple of ideas in my mindd hehe... off

?Inspired

2006-02-25T05:40:00.000-08:00

as we look ahead, we are pretty much clueless where we are heading to
may music be the one to show us our path in life

hmm oh well, the past few days i've been watching couple of band dvds, like the maestro of all marches frederick fennel's "the joy of marches" and basic band technique thing... although most contents in the "basic band technique" are very basic, i still manage to squeeze sometihing out from it, and planning to use it as some warm-up thing for my section... the "joy of marches" dvd was really something, i will just slump back to my sofa and imagine myself being able to be like frederick fennel to conduct and teach a band of my own... well needs hard work i guess.... well anyway this july there is this competition with set piece a march piece...

so after watching this dvd really helped my understanding of marches.. and how marches instead of a dead monotonous and clockwork tempo, can be full of live and how the percussion plays a big part in the whole tempo changes... and especially when he emphasized the importance of the brasses ( tuba, trombone and trumpet) being able to come out at certain points of music and die down, its like a qouting frederick fennel " like u have these mountains (hand actions) up down down up and ... valleys peaks... " the way he teaches the band and exagerrates his movements really brings out the effect his interpretation... there was once when he was really happy ( can in fer from the smile) while conducting... was the music he wanted and was very satisfied with the band... and there's something similar with him and mr tan...

when i was a junior sec1 sec2, whenever i see mr tan happy about the bands music, i would feel happy too, but now its different, i would feel happy and have sense of accomplishment when i have managed to do my music well, and when my section is gd, that makes me feel even better... so now mr tan's mood doesnt change my mood, instead it just brings out the extra confidence in me to outdo his expectations of me, my section and the whole band. however frederick fennel's smile is somewhat similar, u can hear it his music intepretation in very different from the conventional way other bands play... and when he achieves what he wants u can hear the effect and when i heard this effects well makes me smile to myself... its just the magic of music...

well i believe that there is something to learn from everyone, be it ur junior or ur elder. And at every point of my life, especially in my vscb life, i've learnt something... even a abled guy can learn from a disabled guy that one is lucky to be abled and cherish what one has before its lost... actually all one needs is to sit and reflect and think about how one can improve himself as a person and improve on a particular thing (esp after set backs), to be able to learn and teach oneself.

ooh, and anyway ernest dafril eng hwee and me, are froming some flute quartet and stuff and in the march holidays we are planning to do recordings on some quartet pieces.. today we tried some, and was quite good, considering that we havent played together for sometimes... well but i dont believe in anything but perfection.. i'm sure we can be better by the march holidays and by then we do the recordings, it would be "perfect" . and today i tried thirds part for the brian boro's march song.. brings me back to my junior days when i was in second, no melody, low notes, quite challenging to play weird sounds instead of melody come to think of it.. but well it has really trained me to read from the score instead of playing from memory and to look at the conductor since i had no one to rely on except zhi yuan's guidance.

its funny i guess... i started playing soccer as a defender then went on to play defending midfield, have been tackling like siao these few days. its quite similar to flute playing i guess. play the basic low and middle ranges then go on to higher parts and then finally both together. hmm...

anyway i hope to be able to finish my last task by end of march.

Tired.

2006-01-29T08:08:00.000-08:00

Haiz, so tiring... that i cant even seem to do something simple like wearing my clothes properly... anyway, today went all sorts of places met all sorts of people... its kinda funny cause few days ago i was suicidal and now i'm like ok... grr... i guess what didnt make me make the jump was the flute i was holding, if i jump u jump too mr flutey... but oh well cant bear to destroy u.. ah well... then decided hmm... mr flutey needs me to season him... oh ok... i shall do just that for my next 3 months in band.. b4 i find another mr flutey to season... ooh...

hmm back to today, oh well... the first time i took picture with my playing my flute , with the help of my bro of course... hmmm i guess i hasnt been i long time since i've enjoyed playing my flute this much today... tone during my practice today was like much better than previous days... well but i guess it will go back to the old boring me again... haiz... now i touch my left knuckle like no feeling liao... the skin intact but like when i use my finger to go over it.. like to feeling ... even when not practicing also have this prob... haiz... i guess thats what every flautist will get over time... cant really cure it i guess...

i was listening to those recordings my friends and i recorded during the december holidays... the flute quartet and stuff... i'm really lucky to have flute buddies who really take their music seriously and when we play together we have fun... not many people have a chance to be able to find such gd friends to enjoy music making together.. and i really have to thank these people , for without them this learning journey would not have been so interesting.... probably b4 our handover we can complete the few flute choir pieces and the few flute quartet pieces left.... really hope our section can improve tremendously, complete the flute choir pieces , record, then probably i will leave in peace., knowing that there is a bench mark set for the juniors and hopefully they can do above expectations..... ah well... so much for trying to act like a model in the first pic... oh well, sometimes i dont have act, natural talent... haha

CNY Day

2006-01-27T04:45:00.000-08:00

Its weird, today is the day where we should spend our time with our friends and go watch movie something like that and stuff.. well i could not see anything better than play my flute... haiz.. spent my whole afternoon and evening on my flute, until the whole flute inside condense until the last key on the foot joint... was like dripping water all over.. grr.. but well it can be like this hour u are enjoying your own sound.. the next hour u get worked up over a completely horrendous tone... then the next hour u start getting back your fav tone.... haiz... its so inconsistent... i dunno whats wrong with me... then in the mornings i sound much fuller than after sch... these days i sound very thin and weak, like have difficulty getting the right support and stuff... probably because of fatigue... who can blame a guy who sleeps from 12am to 5am.. and takes one hour to prepare b4 leaving at 6am... anyway after giving my fullest attention in class, i tried my best, its very tiring to go down to the band room and take out books and continue to study... well probably playing my flute can give me sort of a computer game effect, but its addictive and somehow i dont know how to control the addiction... and even if i'm not playing my flute well, doesnt stop my from putting down... irritating.... i really gotta put some self-control button on my body....

haiz, i'm not in a very gd condition in my band now... haiz, i have some juniors that dont understand me, i have peers that for a moment lose basic respect for their friends.... as much as i love the band i cant love it the way i used to, cause band is all about its people.... today i saw zhi yuan, and well all i can say is that he hasnt changed after all... still a senior i respect... i cant say much to him cause i dunno whether i have let him down, or whether i am just plain dissapointing on my part... i cant say that the section is doing well when he asked me "hows the section doing"... i cant say its very bad, cause in fact its not... all i could say is ok.. still going on... well i dont wanna always settle with an ok... i want something like... " they are fantastic, u gotta hear them for urself... its worth working with these people man, u gotta experience it for urself...." well although they are not anywhere at that level of musicianship... i can see that they are slowly maturing and most of them feel more responsible not only for their own actions and speech but also for their jobs... i see many of my flute juniors taking initiative to settle basic routine things, and that really makes me happy when i see that they have finally understood the whole idea of being independant... i hope the flute sec 2s and 3s can keep up their attitude and passion towards music and discipline, and hopefully this would be a gd example to the sec 1s... its only 3 more months to go b4 handover.... many speculations that the band will fall and stuff... but i believe with the right attitude instilled in them... they will climb up from any failure to achieve ultimate success... well one has yet another mountain to climb after accomplishing the greatests of heights.... i put my heart and soul to this band... and i hope u can too...

Instrument Check

2006-01-21T07:58:00.000-08:00

Taken a few years back. Count the number of instruments you can see in the picture.

the ans. is 5

Band Life

2006-01-07T07:01:00.000-08:00

haiz... i dunno what to say looking at the current state of the sec3 batch... they are not exactly dissapointing, but not say fantastic either.... a few things i gotta really point out which i really find is a problem in their batch...

firstly most people in their batch dun take band seriously, and lack the understanding of why they are even in band... many people think they come to band just to have fun... well if u wanna have fun your playing then you have to practice to be gd to be able to enjoy what you play... i mean stupid fun like laughing at other people's mistakes when actually is not funny is not even called fun lar... i think its called sheer stupidity multiplying by countless times... its stupid lar... people join band and have a sense of achievement in their playing after months of practice... and this people come together as a band to practice to perfect music and in the process have fun... however our people only can think of the soccer match after band prac... the lunch after sectionals...

Secondly, to me the ultimate failure to any musician, is arrogance... arrogance will lead to many factors which will ultimately contribute to ones downfall... arrogance will make one satisfied with his own achievments and thus one will cease to improve... satisfaction would make one feel that he does not need to improve and makes one think his achievements are remarkable. when actually he could have achieved more if not for arrogance... satisfied with his own achievements in his playing... he would not even consider other peoples advice on how you could improve on certain aspect of playing... he would not accept others comments readily... and often i guess they react negatively strongly when comments are harsh ( because he think he very pro liao ).

and i feel that the sec 3 batch after wearing their long pants most have learnt to observe their own conduct and more of them are focused on doing stuff... but that doesnt mean that they will start to think like seniors... doesnt mean they think the same way as thier SLs do... they are after all still juniors and will (in my eyes) still be juniors even when they go on to take over the band... its because they lack maturity in their thinking... its true that different people start to mature at different times.. i cant blame them for that... but with seniors guiding them along they should have no problem with settling anything else other than that.... me as a senior i give my very best to them... i always strive to be a role model, a gd one to be exact... i'm responsible for my actions... i'm take my attendance seriously... i give to my people all that i can offer... i teach them and impart all my knowledge to them... i gave up myself playing first to teach my juniors at the weaker corner... and gave a sec3 to gain more experience...( when actually i really enjoy playing first with ernest and daffy)... i dun expect to be appreciated.. and i dun want to be either... all i want and expect is just everyone to play their part settle their individual playing... and next is foster gd relations with friends learn to compromise abit here a bit there.... dun have to always go your way... personally i have avoided much trouble with my sec4s... i've learnt to let go what is not mine what is wrong to control... i feel its worth to give up every glory one have for true friendship which will be kept with me forever.... everytime i see the VSCB motto... where dreams come true... it doesnt seem to have any significance... lets focus on the word.. DREAMS.... not everyone's dream to be a gd musician and proffesional one and a respectable one.... and naturally the significance of the motto is lost... cause not everyone has the same dream of being good as a whole, being fantastic as a band.... But VSCB has really shown me a different path, a different experience, a different family like feeling in the band... and most importantly its has shown me what true friendship is all about.... VSCB where dreams come true... this is definitely where i've dreamt of my dream... whether i can realise it its all up to me... get the message?

Sound Day...

2005-12-26T06:57:00.000-08:00

hmm first section outing. haha...
from clockwise... see whether still can remember... hmm
kejian, ernest, eng hwee, josie, vivian, amelia, shi lei , miao peng, yi hao , jing yang

woa.. just came back from SWO concert... it was.. well i would say so far... if i rank all the concerts of music classes i have been it would go like this
1. Boston Brass and frysk fanfare
2. Philwinds goes pops
3. SWO KONZERT 12
4. James alway Master Class
5. St Pats concert

Well its according to how greatly inspired i was after each of the performance.. haha... yeah and u might be wondering why is even St Pats band even on my top 5 list.. when i have been to other concerts like SAF Bands-James Barnes and other concerts ... well simple... cause this band has members around my age and has instruments not very superior to the ones i'm using now.. yet their lvl of musicianship and disciline shown is really respectable... their overall band sound and balance is i would say is fantastic for players that have barely picked up an instrument for only 2 years plus...

Well Back to the number 1... boston brass was really an eye opener... i didnt know that musicians could have so much fun and yet still make music.... its like they were like "dancing" and playing their instruments. and it can be quite funny when they do actions that just sometimes look stupid and yet sometimes look cool... its like the first time i was enjoying the music and enjoying a show. simultaneously... very interesting... then there was JD SHAW... the horn guy... his tone is so pure... and so refined, i could only just sit close my eyes and while listening to his tone... slowly drift into another world... and trust me.. after u here that sad portion he had just played.. tears will start to swell up in ur eyes.. haha... he's gd... then got all 5 of the boston brasses signatures... really something quite incredible... and yes frysk fanfare was equally as entertaining.... every single player was able to project using bell tones.. and their trombones were like machines.. their slides were like link together... most positions they changed were like so together.. that they just distract u so easily away from the whole band... very gd music it was... and the conductor was like using a quite different style of conducting.. well, its like drawing a picture on air... thats how he conducted.. haha... looks very stylish.. well... its something new i've seen.. haha.. yups..

Well and then the 2nd philwinds... ooh it was just few weeks back... so far the cleanest band i;ve ever heard so far... the music they presented was like right on the table for u to enjoy.. no need to strain ears to decipher any thing.. it was i would say to most enjoyable concert i've ever been to... well the princess mononoke was very controlled. and the dynamic ranges was very well brought out... it was really a previledge to be able to buy that ticket and sit in the theatre to watch what i would easily say Singapore's best band.... yes... and yup many solo pieces by a euphonium, a mallet girl... and the yong siew toh conservatorium flautist sheryl? cheryl? something like that.. she played cant take my eyes off u.. yupp.. wasnt as gd as the last time i heard her at the james galway master class... but was maintainable.. haha... the whole esplanade was full house just like the boston brass... but this time there was something very common about both concerts... which was the NOISY AUDIENCES... grr... can get quite irritating.. haha

Then the 3rd todays SWO concert ... well i love their flute section sound... i mean the SWO not the sembawang symphonic orchestra... there were like 4 flautist and my tutor(piccolo) yup, ... they treat and give every single note particular attention... and so neat and tidy in their articulation... their intonation .. dont have to say.... a bit obvious... yar.. and there were many parts of the music in the repertoire that had like only the woodwinds playing... and as usual the flutes were up there... their sound is so lifting... it just sits on top of the bad... even during soft passages i could hear them so clearly... well i had a few moments in the concert hall almost got off my seat ..haha was truly breath taking at certain points... well but didnt dare to give a standing ovation ...haha... me and my brother both agreed that it was so much better and less of a torture after being to my concert being to VJ concet.. and many more.. haha...

then there is of cousre the james galway masterclass... haha i so kia su.. go book 4 tickets haha... yup then seng kiang darren wai ngai ernest dafril eng hwee darrel and me went to the masterclass... well hae nothing to say.. too hard to describe the experience.. haha... well... YAWNS TIRED LIAO,... Late at night.. grr. i go to bed.. ZZZzzzzZZzZZZZzzzzzZzZZZZzzZ

Technique Practice Day...

2005-12-20T04:30:00.000-08:00

I can still remember when i was sec2... less active in band politics, less active in section stuff... when i was so carefree... and all i had to care is just my playing.... its like just last year and its passed so fast... then i can still remember on SYF period during the first few months from january - april.. and handover... and thats passed even faster... well i have used to enjoy band when i was a kid (sec1 and sec2) so much, that when i look back i can only cry to myself.. looking at the me i am today... pathetic... i dun blame anyone at the state i am in now... well probably i brought it upon myself... ever since seng kiang has passed on his job to me... i have so many troubles that is kept inside me.. that all that i shouted at my people is not even a quarter of what is inside... probably it has hindered my improvement rate... but i have never ever complained... all i want is for my juniors to work hard in under my guidance... and that will ensure them ultimate success... but what i get from them is so many problems... i try to help them.. but they dun help themselves... so it ends up that i have to help them super hard to even get them to get their so insignificant achievement in their instrument... haiz.. i feel sad for them.. and feel sad that as their leader, i am not able to motivate then the way my seniors have motivated me.. and guidedme along... i dunno whether its thier own fault or whether the fault lies with me... but if its not mine it has to be... cause its my job...

Oh yup today i practiced my technique exercises... its been a long time since i've practiced it... feels gd to be able to focus more on my technique aspect on my playing and at the same time train to get a gd tone... its hard to do both at the time... requires alot of discipline.. which i dont have when i practice at home.. haha... its VS that allows me to sit and concentrate... today i see my juniors paint the banner and memories start flowing back... i was the chap who painted the bassoon at my batch banner............. haha... well.. as i listen to rhapsody of hannukah.(the sad part) i really miss those times when life in band was much simpler... practice , fun, and push ups... of uwe share our most enjoyable moments and most harsh enduring moments of our life together as a batch... we were like a family... now as all of us have taken up different posts... and have divided loyalties over the years... we have become very divided... and cause of divided loyalties... which many choose LAN GAMES instead of BAND... the playing standard of VSCB is dropping tremendously... even seniors indulge in LAN GAMES.... thats the example they are setting... well personally i prefer to have this mentality to tell myself that i suck, and use the amount of time the spend at LAN GAMES to settle my own playing.... umm i dun see why people think its not worth the effort in practicing when they can go play games... probably they think its easy to achieve something like GWH at 2007 .. or to achieve gd playing standards... but when i look at sec1s and thier GAMING HABITS.. i just cant resist to unleash my hatred and anger... when my batch flute people were sec1 we probably practiced much more than we practice now... and i think it was right from the start that have made us endured all the way till now... remember the 100 pushups this year... no one quit... its love... its love .. its love for this band... i dunno how to put it... well i remember when i first asked each sec1 why they joined band..." i like music" " interest in music" "CCA points"... apparently liking and having interest in music doesnt really show... cause having to drop by the band room once a week in the holiday or not dropping by at all shows everthing.... MY DEAR JUNIORS MY DEAR JUNIORS.... its time that u understand that if its something u want to achieve... u gotta work for it... i was sec1... and i told myself its impossible to be as pro as zhan xiong as pro as thiam kee zhi yuan and kenny.... but its only impossible if i dun try at all... it will be impossible if i dun give it my best shot... i f dun put in my best... everything is impossible... I'm no longer sec1... i'm sec3 now.. and i still strongly stick to the very same mentality i have always from sec1... i'm not begging u for my sake... i do everything for u... if i hurt u ... u know it too.. cause it hurts me when i hurt u all...

Confused week

2005-12-15T08:18:00.000-08:00

this week seems to pass so fast.. probably because its like the week that i have touched me flute the least...sometimes i feel empty to practice on my own,... everytime i try to play something with my brother.. duets and stuff... will only last like1hr.. then he dun want liao... i bored seh.. i miss ernest company.. haha... we used to play those duets for well at least 2hrs... the end of the day very tired... but fun... i guess i have to find some time to practice more of my technique exercises.. haha... back to the technique side ... currently there is something going on on MSN with nan hua and Vs band.... whole day have mass chat.. i dunno why they dun spend their time more wisely on practicing... at least touching the instrument...

Yesterday i was talking to one alumni, was telling him my problems and stuff... well it seems that what he says is really true.. probably different people have different expectation of themselves, and that forcing is not very gd.. haiz ... although i was rather enlightened by his words.. i am still rather disturbed, its like he tells u that some things are beyond ur control, the more u want it to be in ur control.. the more u want to do something , when actually nothing can be done... i also dunno lar... maybe i shall prove him wrong and show that something can be done (no offence)...

Now currently preparing alot of for my next SL... I'm trying to set my section as efficient as possible in the admin side.. like setting up for band practices... discipline and stuff... and of course raising their playing standards... seems rather hard to accomplish so many things in one short holiday... haha i think i got it all planned out and ready to finish waht i set to do in this holidays... probably its not really shown ...haha ..cause i do it underground... dont really like to show what my plans are haha... i learnt that never to trust anyone so openly, cause they are bound to betray you... if u know what i mean.. then ok lor.. haha...

The SL after me is really going to be very pressurized... i can forsee he(whoever he is) is gonna have lots of things to settle after the current sec3s leave... I trying my best to help u hor future SL... now i trying to do everything for u.. haha.. but even so.. there will be bound to be problems after we leave... i guess its up to them(current sec2s) to change as they grow up to be mature and promising leaders... sometimes i dont understand why my juniors cannot take thier music seriously and just sit disciplinly and do their warmup and scales long tones... now a simple advice to warm-up from me, is not really heeded... i guess i have to come down hard on them... well after all enjoying and making music is all linked to the very basic of the basics... which is warm-up scales appegios chromatic scales..etc... my juniors dont seem to be doing any of these ...and they just pick up their instrument and fool around...

I dunno, maybe this is what future batches of VSCB members has to present to its alumnis... maybe this once highly respected band is going on its path to lose all the respect that was so hardly fought for by all the alumnis... last its was every VSMB boys dream that VS band would be respected and recognized for its wonderful music... now its every VSCB boy dream to score their A1 for CCA... But for me as a VSCB boy... its my dream to make good music and enjoy myself... thats it woaw its late 1 am exact... signing off..haha

Farewell Day

2005-11-24T17:31:00.000-08:00

Haiz after this sec 4 farewell.. i began to realise something... one doesnt have to be recognized to be appreciated... thats why i feel prizes are just for show... many of my fellow band members have worked very hard there and it shows... i appreciate their effort in making our band better... i thank them for giving so much to the band... But there are still a majority not doing their part getting their parts right, getting their technique right... or maybe at least TRYING to get their parts and techniques right... A gd band can only function with good members, and good members will only come by if there are gd seniors who set the standard and are role models... Now with the leaders of the band not going the extra mile for us, i dont know what to do for the band.. apart from settling my SL job... i cant possibly sit and see these people fall b4 i go and help them right? Since the future is easily predictable why dont i try to help them and voice out my opinion... but come again... i have no say when comes to these matters.... i feel like helping out with other parts of concert prep.. but find myself slacking aound instead of helping... so ive decided that, maybe i should just try concentrating on my sec1s and hopefully our 40th Aniiversary concert will go well...

The Thinking Day

2005-10-31T19:20:00.000-08:00

As a member of such a great band.. naturally, i expect more from myself and more from the band... I dont find anytyhing wrong with it... I can never accept anything thats below what i think is right.... I mean how can i be satified with so little... when there is a large portion ahead waiting for u to grab... i cant sit and wait for it the come as time goes by... i feel that i have to do the best in everything.. call me and fucker, call me useless... i wont change... i'm not stubborn... all i want is the best for all of you... I wanna make your life in upper sec a life that is so much easier, where u can focus on making music itself.. and not really troubled by technique problems... Its tough the make music learning fun, well we try to, but there are still some strict guidelines one have to follow when music learning is no fun...

I think putting in hours and hours of practice is rather useless... Only when the process of practicing surfaces a problem in the course of perfection... i would call it worth the time practice... cause it gives you an individual, the time to look into our own playing, and eradicate the problem, that has been hindering your progress... i remember once i told my section... A small improvement everyday is all that it takes... Over time u will make a big improvement and become a better player... And i still strongly stick to it.. i feel in the success to being a fantastic player is consistency... above all the effort and determination... Others might have other ways of teaching themselves.. but i feel that consistency is the one... its because it makes sures that after everyday of practicing u feel more irritated with your sound... as colin the horn guy said" musicians are very easily irritated people... once they hear themselves so irritating sound, they would find a way to get it right... " yes and through the course of saying i suck man.. damn shit, why my sound sound like shit... ah, then by these sincer comments u give urself, the natural strive to improve will always be there to push u on to greater heights...

I dunno whether its true.. i think i know why people like shing wei can just sit and practice... and although the product to him which is not good, have to discipline to push aside distraction and say no... he continues to strive on... I think i know why people like ernest comes in to the band room , first thing flute, next thing find a chair to sit for proper practice, and never gets destracted or angered by anything around him... I KNOW WHY. I THINK I KNOW... ITS THAT THEY HAVE THE DETERMINATION TO BE BETTER, AND BETTER, THEY HAVE THE WILL TO WORK FOR EXCELLENCE... ITS A POWERFUL ONE... I dunno whether to make a statue at home to worship them everyday, or dig 2 graves in my house so that when they pass on..i can have their ever striving and learning attitude... But for now i know that as long as i continue to learn from people like them... and be able to adopt a better mindset towards playing and music... i know that one day my dream would come true... AND THE PLACE WHERE DREAMS COME TRUE IS AT VSCB.... So my fellow friends(be it juniors or seniors) bear no grudes, bear no hatred... Work towards a common, goal.. VSCB where dreams come true... Thanx for reading...

Some Speech Thing

2005-10-22T07:53:00.000-07:00

Many a times I just wanted to give up. But when I am at the verge of doing so, after all the anger that has accumulated in the months, I thought of how many others have helped me in my band life. And that simple thought has pushed me to be able to brush aside all the hatred and anger I have tolerated with you all, and continue my job. Many a times I have scolded, punished and even shouted, at you all. But I hope you can forgive me for most of the unreasonable acts. I hope you can understand the pressure my batch of sec3s are going through. As for me, I am not those type of sit back and relax person. I will do my best in my job. And apparently it has not really gone very well in the past few months. My only conclusion is the bad cooperation, misunderstandings and attitude in our section.

Firstly, I have realized that the juniors in my section do not really do what they are being told to do. In the sense that they do not bother to follow their teachers teachings. That has led to very poor and slow progress in their playing. I feel that they are not mature enough to be left alone, in their practice. Their wrong way of practice have led to many bad habits and bad techniques. Poor practicing habits have troubled me ever since I have learnt how to play the flute. Last time I did not know how to practice correctly. Now I am troubled on how my fellow band mates practice. I have a feeling that if such slack attitude remains unchanged, SYF 2007 will be at stake. And the standard of the band will evidently drop. From today onwards after the meeting I really hope that we can work and bring glory back to VSCB.

Secondly, cooperation and understanding between juniors and seniors is not good at all. In such a big section like ours, its very important to be involved and informed of the latest updates and on-goings. Since there are so many changes now and then, Cooperation in completing each task is important. Same goes to understanding. One reason for not being able to push our section to its maximum potential individually and as a section, is due to my first point. Second point is the lack of cooperation, like not turning up for band practices and sectionals. This has put me in a very difficult position, as this would be in the way of my job. Extra classes and appointments, are now and then popping up, disrupting the schedule. But I hope you can understand that as hard as it is for you to cancel the appointment, it is also hard for me to set a date to accommodate everyone. So I hope you all can understand and prioritize on 3 main Days. Band Practice Day, Sectionals Day, and Meeting Days. These three days is your main criteria to fulfill. After the meeting. The days will be set, and I hope that all of you can plan for the holidays, as there will be a lot of changes and practice time would be lengthened. I feel that priority has to be given to band at all cost. Especially at a time like this. It’s crucial.

Thirdly, the attitude towards music is quite off these days. The environment we are living in now is very unhealthy for music. Competition is everywhere in Singapore. I feel that there is no need to be better than any specific band. Many VSCB members have the thinking of being better than other schools. Well I can see their determination. However this is in the wrong form. In our section, instead of competition, we lie in the third category of people. Which is “I THINK I’M GOOD ENOUGH” type of logic. This attitude has led to complacency. Although it does not clearly show. A slight hint of such attitude, always lead to a bigger and much more complex problem. You might think I am extra. Not productive in my teachings. But you have to think about you yourself having this attitude “.”. Its only because you do not want to accept my way of running the section, and think that we are good enough, that has hindered our progress. As zhi yuan saying goes “If you think you are good, You have just lost half the battle”. I can clearly remember this saying, because it really was an impact on me. It has really changed me. I sincerely want everyone in our section to do justice to those who have left and contributed so much.

I have always thought that in the world, there is only 2 options in tackling a problem. One is by escaping it, the other is by solving it. In band, I have always adopted the escaping route and had the thought of fielding only my best players in performances. However after much reflecting on myself, I changed the perspective, and instead of bringing out the polished gems and leaving the unpolished ones to rot. Why don’t I polish all of them to become priceless gems. Without your cooperation, no gems will be polished. I feel as the section leader of this splendid section, having the correct way of seeing things is important. And I hope that my juniors will mature soon, much sooner. And definitely much faster, so that I can entrust this section with ease to the next SL. When I had just received the SL post on handover day, I did not know what to do. I was unprepared, lost, unaware of anything. I was not even ready to take on this challenge. It was really a hard time to be able to muster all the courage to be able to even hold a section meeting. I was untrained and felt really helpless at times, as no one was there to help me. Until recently that I have trained myself to overcome so much. Now I feel that I have a responsibility to not let any other junior in my section to suffer the same fate as I had suffered. So there would be an implementing of a new post system in my section. Hopefully there would be no objections. Further details to be in the meeting.

Well after getting the GWH in the recent SYF, I was overjoyed, not by the fact of the award we were awarded, not because that there would be glory and fame after the competition. But its because of the process of our SYF preparations, which has led me to see a bigger picture of the band I now love even more. And as the whole story ended on a high note, after all the effort put in. I was really proud of being able to achieve something for the first time in my life. Not as an individual, but as a group, as a family, as a band. As the saying goes “one band one sound” we really did exactly that on SYF day. And the feeling of such great and strong bond in them playing the music was really breath taking. I sort of felt everyone around me, in my heart. The SYF performance was one of the most sincere and would I say magical performances I have ever had in my life. Although the playing was not fantastic, the music really strengthen our trust in each other as a band. As they say music does magic.

All this is in preparations for the future batches in future SYFs and Concerts. My main goal is to build a trustable group of teachers, so that the future of the band which lies in the hands of these well trained musicians, would be bright. And this would last for a long time. The thought of every student being his own teacher is really amazing. As I can already visualize it in my head. It is possible. This idea has been adopted by many excellent school bands in Singapore. I hope to achieve my goal within the time I am given, and I really wish that you both juniors and seniors, whom I assume loves this home, this family, VSCB, can help me achieve it. And I believe that this dream is not only mine, but it is also yours too.

The Interesting Days

2005-09-25T07:52:00.000-07:00

Ooh... yesterday and today was how should i put it in.. very interesting.. well yesterday i went to seoul gardens to eat for the first time. last time i thought seoul gardens is in a garden got table then they serve you.. haha actually its sort of a cook for urself buffet thing... yup and i learnt something from it too.. the food provided there is fantastic well but it's still up to the individual to cook it well to be nice... well lets link it back to music... when i cooked my food i did not know how to cook so i just tested and see if the colour has any relationship with the taste... i was rather lucky to get my first guess right.. well then i tried cooking several pieces of meat and slowly from the initial brown meat i realized that a dark brown meat tasted better and so on... well its a good experience.. actually it s the same as a musician with his instruement.. i feel that we should experiment with our technique and tone and more... only this way can we improve... well many musicians are contented with their so called " GOOD TONE GOOD TECHNIQUE" well i feel that if we folow the basic guidline and just practice we will be only be able to reachour maximum potential.. well why not try experimenting different tones see which one suits u better? try something different? it is only with that can we go above our potential.. well so try cooking and you will understand what i am saying haha...

well just yesterday i read a flute article on tone variation.. and today i tried.. very interesting and its not difficult at all.. well i think i better settle my basic stuff first..next time then try in depth... hah.. and today i went to buy my new pair of rubber finger pads... ooh the grip and friction the pads provides is fantastic and the best of all it sticks to the flute.. ooh although its rather expensive , but its worth the quality... well just stuck those pads on so CHECK IT OUT...

The Cruel Day

2005-09-19T06:36:00.000-07:00

Its so cruel!!! today i forgot to bring my flute to school!!!! yar and i pumped myself 50 for that and have already regretted for forgetting... ARHGGG... No flute for the whole 12 hours in school... and not only thats.. today first in many decades VSCB screwed up Victorian Anthem for the first time... I mean that although good bands are allowed flop from time to time.. VSCB can never be allowed to be capable of that.. i am quite impressed or rather shocked to see so many people dismissing this incident as just a screw up once in a while...

I mean that there must be a problem in the first place, so we should look out and point out the problem then we should work on it... instead of dismissing it as a screw up and still think that we are GWH... i feel that arrogance has started to set in the band and that many have learnt to think that a flop once in a while is acceptable... just take for example.... at the start of the year after our first flop, many thought that it was because the sec4s just left... then just dismissed the flop just like that... just count how many flop we had from then on... (try counting in ur head, cause the fingers and toes arent enough)... people apparently dont see the big pictures.. i can roughly and quite confidently say that VSCB is made up of a bunch of note players instead of musicians.... cause i have always have the impression that musicians are perfect and have the right attitude and determination for everything...

The fact for some to dismiss todays failure is really too much to take.... After exams I shall show my juniors the path towards real music and if the band has to be isolated in getting what our section goal... ( ever learning habit... people with different individual personality.... character... and or course pursue of good musicianship ).. so be it... i dont want people who are not interested to affect my section... Or would i rather say Your section....

I have always feel that the VSCB flute section is really something more compared to other sections... in a way that we are something special, something thats' the difference between the best band practice and the OK band practice.... the difference between an OK performance and an excellent performance... i've always felt we are the ones that make the difference the ones that can make everything perfect... Last time i could confidently say VSCB flute section, the Perfectionist... no room for error zero tolerant... well i must really work hard after exams to get a perfectionist section...

High ambitions and high expectations are neccesary in a band like ours, So if u think this expectation is high then you are not in the right band... the door is open again... i really love mr tan for simply his devotion towards music.. i have placed all my hopes trust believe and even my heart and soul to him... just for the ultimte devotion for music... Well many of u out there arent think of the devotion he is putting in.. in fact many of u are like saying that mr tan too strict and many more criticsizm... Mr Tan doesnt make music... He makes magic... cause there were times where i would melt under his baton... at these small and short moments under his conducting are just fantastic.. well they are rather short lived... Enduring more on the painful truth that our band is not techniquecaly stable is rather painful and disheartenning....

SO FELLOW VSCB MUSICIANS AFTER EXAMS LETS WORK TOGETHER AND WORK TOWARDS A BRIGHT FUTURE... ZERO 00000000000000000000000000 TOLERANT!!!!!!

The Quiet Day

2005-09-14T20:27:00.000-07:00

Haiz its been a hectic week and there are five more of such weeks to go... one thing that has really changed drastically is the atmosphere in and outside the band room, it has lost its once lively atmosphere, where all of us mix around and do stuff together... those noisy groups jacks, those noisy group disscusions or (e.s.p), those talk cock sessions... i miss them. And the once noisy band room where everyone just comes down to practice.. and once u enter the band room or even open the door... these noises would just blast straight at you... all these things just happen to fade away as the exams draw nearer.

Haiz. Entering a big band room with so little people in it. is just like entering a cinema with nobody in it. its boring man.. you dont get a loud reaction from the audience in an empty cinema, you dont get that much suspence and exitement without the audience... its the same as in the band room... an empty band room has no life in it... its boring... its saddening too... to come to think of it people these days tend to prioritize on certain things during a certain period of time... there's actually no need for this... as long as we are constantly consistent in our tasks, we would be able to achieve equally gd results in anything...

Thats why i dont understand this logic... its goes "I WANT TO BE A FANTASTIC PLAYER, BUT I DONT WANT TO PRACTISE." .... OR " I WANT TO BE A FANTASTIC PLAYER, BUT I HAVE NO TIME FOR IT"... Come on, if we want to achieve things, we have to work for it, if we want to be good we have to be consistant, if we want to be Fantastic we have to make sacrifices now and then. So why do live in a world of deception, decieving ourselves that we can be good just by waiting for the right moment to come... instead of working to achieve something, we are waiting to achieve nothing...

Some people think they are good, and then they start to slack... Some think they are OK and start to slacken(because they think they are ahead of others). While others just think that they are plain lousy and that there is no use in investing some time in the practice.. I strongly feel that these are the few attitudes that majority of my fellow band mates possess, and well its really unacceptable to have such attitudes for musicians ( if they are even musicians ). I feel that a musician is very similar to a student... a musician should posses this never say die attitude and not give up so easily. however when he is successful he should not be too arrogant about his accomplishments, as this would only lead to complacentcy and other character problems ( like some alumnis i know of )... he should also have this ever learning drive to learn more and keep improving himself, be it knowledge or technique... all these are also the basic attitudes that every good student has... as a student i have learnt many ways of management and many ways of time allocating.... In being an amateur musician, these ways of management have been useful and are helpful in my course of music making...

Many people have asked me, "how is my tone arh?" i also dont know how to answer them. i mean its like u know it urself. its whether u like it or not right... if u like it then even it is not good who cares.... But personally i feel that a proffesional tone is one that not only sounds pleasant to its audience, not only technically good, but most importantly it has to be your own personal tone (u own the tone) one that is distinct from the rest... thats what i rate as a fantastic tone.

Anyway, today i made an audacious gamble, but it proved to work out well so... moral of the story.. "IF YOU WANT TO FANTASTIC, YOU HAVE TO SOMETIMES GO ON A RISKY PATH RATHER THAN THE PLAIN OLD SAFE PATH"... Many Fantastics in the post... well i really hope to be able to make at least a slight positive comment but sorry, i cant find any to write.. " Fantastic = risk, hardwork, humble, good attitude " well thats my definition...

The Troubled Day

2005-09-10T06:38:00.000-07:00

Haiz, i dont ever believe in writing blogs, and always feel that its just a waste of time. But wat happened today has really let me realise that i have nowhere to express everything i want to say. And that has brought me into using this blog.

I dont understand... I'm trying so hard.. Ernest is trying so hard.. Few people are trying very hard... but the most of the majority are not even bulging... i want to enjoy playing music! not noise! Apparently i feel that sometimes u guys (not practicing ones) are a bunch of ingrate selfish bunch of noisy _ _ _ _ _ _ _... We are trying our best to keep improving and there u all just come and spoil everything.. i really think that once a commitment is made we have to live through it.... once a commitment is made to band , we should put all our hearts to it and do our best to improve... i'm really saddened that my own juniors the sec2s., dont understand and dont realise that wat i do, wat we do is all for them... i have to wake them up!!.. i have a responsibility here.. if i dont care.. nobody else will.. i feel to a certain extent that as a band, we have let down our alumnis(ancestors). instead of carrying on the glory where they left of, we have not only let them down, we have also created a new tradition of whereby the standard keeps going down... i always thought that when the sec3s take over the band would rise, but never would i have expected us the fail.. and the worst thing is fail to the most basic attribute every band has and that is discipline.. some juniors even think greeting is a joke (no offence). its is not like VSCB does not have the best instruments, it is not like VSCB has a small band room... WE have a bloody huge band room... with 3k and 4k instruments each.. i dont understand.. with such an advantage over other bands, why are we taking everything for granted and just leeting everything wonderful slip by... its just like music, if u dont cherish the gd music now, u will just look back and regret.. but in the first place if we dont produce good music, how do we even regret not producing good music...

This is the day, i mark as the end of VSCB's Failure... If u are not going to do anything about it... I am going to... If you dont want to live with the commitment you have choosen and made, then quit for all i care... what we want to see is the effort as i always emphasize... I have done my part(not fully)... when are u going to start doing your part?